Thoughts On Marriage, part 2

by Scottie Joines

God’s vision of marriage for us is very different than the average American marriage. What does it look like to apply these principles to our marriages? God tells us that too. It’s a passage that I’m sure that the majority of people who read my blog are familiar with. God’s vision for marriage is clearly stated in Ephesians 5:21-33. But there’s a catch...

 “… Submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”


When I take these directions and apply them to my own marriage, I see that the key to this working is in verse 21. It states that we are to be subject to one another in the fear of Christ. Ok, I’m in a list-making mood, let’s break it down.

1. Submit to each other out of respect for the Lord.
2. Wives, submit to your husband as if you would to the Lord. (note: God does not expect blind obedience to evil and God would never abuse a wife.)
3. Husbands love your wives and give yourselves up for her as Christ did for His church on the cross. (note: This doesn’t mean to put yourself in harm’s way to prove your love.)

What’s the catch? It takes both of us. At the same time. That is the hard part.