Ramblings of a Changing Man: Trust

by Steve Ferber
This journey started in July 2009.  I had been laid off due to lack of work, I had a really good job but the company I worked for was downsizing drastically due to the economic down turn.  God provided a job in November, but it was for about two thirds of what I had been earning.  I believed that God was going to provide me with a good job; I was doing my part but not striving in the flesh.

In October 2009 I was working on my car when God spoke to me “You do not trust Me”.  It was an audible voice, not in the spirit like I normally hear. I started crying and was broken before Him.  I repented of not trusting Him.  I did not understand but I knew that God had just reached out to me.  The next few months were an emotional roller coaster.
  
In February 2010 I realized that I had trusted God to provide through my skill set, not just in Him.  I had been trusting in myself using God as my helper.  I received a deposit of trust in my spirit that February, I did not do anything to earn it; all I did was surrender to Him on a daily basis.

The next few months brought many more deposits from the Lord into my life.  I had shared with Steve Watson on several occasions what God was doing in my life.  He always encouraged me to write a journal about what God was doing in my life. I thought it was a good idea, but I never got around to it.

June 2010 brought about a new season in the Lord.  I had walked through a lot of correction from the Lord in the past year.  Now it seemed that I was entering into His rest.

July 1, 2010 brought another lay off due to a lack of work.  This time I found that I was at peace with the Lord, resting in Him.  God provided another job in August, I took another forty percent cut in pay. The times were really hard for my family then.  We had gone thru foreclosure in July and were in the process of personal bankruptcy.  God provided us a place to rent a lot closer to church.  I did not understand at the time but it has proven to be a really good thing.  The best thing is that I was still at peace with the Lord; I had not allowed the circumstances I was facing to change my trust in God.

October 2010.  The Holy Spirit continues to prompt me to write a journal, I have not been obedient!  I decided that I needed to be accountable in this.  I asked Steve Watson and Ron Ross if I could send them my writings, they said sure.  As I thought about what to write I really did not have a clue…… after all I am not a big reader, let alone write.  The Holy Spirit reminded me of the scripture that tells of the Apostles being sent out after they were filled with the Holy Spirit.  They were not to worry about what to say, the Holy Spirit would give them what to say when they needed it.  Once again it comes down to trusting Him and not my abilities or lack thereof.

March 2011.  I find myself without work once again.  I continue to be at peace with the Lord, He has certainly proven to be faithful over the years.  I am trying to follow the Holy Spirits lead, even though I do not know what lies ahead.

Trusting in the Lord, what can I say?  It is like a thread running entirely thru a garment, it effect’s all areas of my life. With out it I will not be able to experience Gods will for my life.  Gary Oliver has a song called ‘I will trust in the Lord’; it has been a comfort and inspiration for me thru difficult times.  God is always faithful to do what is best for me.  I am determined to trust in the Lord! I will do this by picking up my cross daily, dying to the flesh.  Not by my strength, but by the mercy and grace brought to me by Jesus Christ’s sacrifice on the cross.

May you learn to trust the Lord, receiving His peace that passes all understanding.  Cast all your cares upon the Lord, for His yoke is easy and His burden is light.  Trust Him with your life!